Archived: The Divorced/Divorcing/Children of Divorce Club Thread...
Posted Under: Deeper Discussions
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Divorced/Divorcing/Children of Divorce Club Thread...
02/18/09 11:36 am | #137
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Quote by PSORaine:
Quote by MDub93:
Well when my mom and dad got separated, my mom had full custody of me, I dunno if that's the same case for him but it happened with me.
It depends on whether the separation is legal or not. If you haven't filed papers in court, then it's not a legal separation, and neither parents HAS to give the kids to the other. The thing is once you DO file for divorce if either parent was uncooperative it can go against them.
There's a huge push now towards fathers being given custody, the thing is the mothers tend to have it during the separation, and a lot of times the judge just keeps them where they're used to being.
But if they're unhappy or in danger, it's worth a conversation with a lawyer...
No, no separation papers have been filed. But, long story short, I moved out from our house, because I thought that would make it easier for the kids (no big change of scenery, etc.) but I still saw them every day. She was also working, so when I got off work, I would pick them up from the gym where she taught aerobics, and take them home, do homework, feed them, play with them, and give them their nightly bath/brushing teeth routine, and put them to bed. Then, she up and moved 2 hours away, and took the kids with her. We did verbally agree to joint custody, but I am not getting it. A lawyer basically told me I am screwed, because they have been there with her, more than they have been with me.
Re: Re: The Divorced/Divorcing/Children of Divorce Club Thread...
02/18/09 4:38 pm | #140
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Quote by PSORaine:
I don't know the laws in N. Carolina, but I had full custody given to me by the court in MN and had moved to GA when my ex husband kidnapped my daughter and took her back to MN with him. 
He was allowed to keep her.... So IDK.
I'd talk to more lawyers!
He was allowed to keep her.... So IDK.I'd talk to more lawyers!
Yeah, I am considering doing that, again. Honestly, I have been in pure hell for the last.... almost 3 years. I am starting to get to the point where I am sick of it, and starting to try and piece my life back together with or without her. I'm not quite there, but I feel closer!
I am seriously thinking of telling her enough is enough, and that its time for her to either get on my train, or get off. Re: The Divorced/Divorcing/Children of Divorce Club Thread...
02/18/09 6:46 pm | #141
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I think this is a really nice idea for a thread. I haven't gone through a divorce but I'm sure it's terrible.
I wish everyone going through hard times good luck.
I wish everyone going through hard times good luck.
Re: Re: Re: Re: The Divorced/Divorcing/Children of Divorce Club Thread...
02/19/09 1:21 am | #143
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Quote by PSORaine:
Get on your train??? Is that a euphemism for... sex?
you know, at first i thought this thread was created in spite of me...
Re: Re: Re: Re: The Divorced/Divorcing/Children of Divorce Club Thread...
02/19/09 8:52 am | #148
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Quote by PSORaine:
Quote by Riff Moonraker:
Yeah, I am considering doing that, again. Honestly, I have been in pure hell for the last.... almost 3 years. I am starting to get to the point where I am sick of it, and starting to try and piece my life back together with or without her. I'm not quite there, but I feel closer! I am seriously thinking of telling her enough is enough, and that its time for her to either get on my train, or get off.
I am seriously thinking of telling her enough is enough, and that its time for her to either get on my train, or get off. Noooooo.... its a euphemism for my life. I am sick and tired of being depressed and beating myself up over all of this, and I am ready to move towards letting myself heal, and to try to be a human being again. If she doesnt want to be part of that (ala, my train)... then the train is going to leave the station. I am tired of being in limbo, not knowing what she wants to do. Almost three years of this has taken a toll on me, and our kids, and enough is enough. What I meant was she needs to decide whether she wants to be a family, or not. Sex? What is that???
