Quote by PSORaine:
So I know a lot of the members on the forum are married... a large percent for a gaming forum! Since there has been lots o' behind the scenes drama happening lately and it's made me wonder... I'll share with you guys- on this primarily VIDEO GAME forum- what I've been pondering. (plus it's been a while since my last bloggy post...) I'd love to read all your thoughts on this matter.
I was talking to Evol about marriage before, and he mentioned he didn't see a benefit to being married, and that he really didn't know any that worked. That made me sad... And when he asked me "Why get married?" I didn't have an answer.
So why do you guys think people should get married, if you think they should. And what constitutes a "real" marriage? Is it two people who have been married for over a decade who don't really know or like each other? Is it newlyweds who just got married and are still in the haze of love that makes them feel like there's no one else around? Are they more married than two people who live together for years, but never get married? Does the wedding ring and piece of paper make them more committed than they were the day before?
And at the end of a marriage... what lengths do you go to to try to save it? If it's over, and you KNOW it's over... are you obliged to save it? If you're not happy, and your spouse refuses to meet you in the middle... does that make you a bad person when you decide to walk away? Is it controlling or loving to alienate your spouse from their friends, and tell them they aren't allowed to have hobbies if they're something you don't do as well?
At what point does marriage make you stop caring how you look... when you go from that cool, together person they fell in love with to that insane psycho they can't get away from fast enough... and all of a sudden, you don't care what you look like, your pride is gone, and you're reduced to a caricature of a Junior High student.
Knowing that 50% of marriages end in divorce... and knowing the depths people's souls plummet to during divorce... Why DO we get married? Why bother, when there's a 50% chance you're going to have to crawl out of the burning wreckage of your marriage charred and crushed and completely different? Knowing there's a 50% chance you're going to humiliate yourself in front of people you don't even know? Knowing that there's a 50% chance you're going to carry a lifetime of scars with you?
Is the other 50% really worth that risk?
I have been with my wife since 2000, we got married this past April and are coming up on a year. I love my wife unconditionally and she loves me the same. We have survived a lot of different things over the past 8 1/2 years, but we have always been there for each other and always will be. We got married because it is important to us as Christians. If you think marriage is just a piece of paper and some metal then you may want to open up the bible.
You obviously have a biased opinion towards marriage, whether you are married or not there is a 50% chance of it not working out. People misunderstand the significance of marriage. It is "Till death do us part" obviously if you are being physically and mentally abused by your partner then there are certain instances that are okay to call for a divorce. But to divorce because you no longer love that person or because it is to hard is riduculous. You obviously didn't love them that much in the first place. A marriage takes a lot of hard work and adjusting. You need to improve yourself daily and take note of your faults. No one is perfect nor does your partner expect you to be.
The number one reason of a failed marriage is a lack of "Communication". Communication is the single most important factor in marriage and without it being used properly and consistantly the marriage will fail.
Also, since I have been married I have improved my phisique and lost weight, going on 45lbs. My wife has joined me in going to the gym and eating healthier. We also have mutual friends that we hang out with together or alone. We allow each other to have hobbies and spend time alone. Mine is video games, hers is scrap booking.
I'm 26 and I have a good job, house, two cars and most importantly a partner to share it all with through the sacred bond of marriage.
Congrats to those who are married, it's a long and wonderful ride and I would do it over again..........
P.S. Marriage can be a wonderful thing if you find the right person that shares your goals, thoughts and ideals.......
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