The story is called 'Charlie Sheen Night' all about 'winning' for Bakersfield Condors
I hope the Democrats run Charlie Sheen in the primaries. He has HUGE advantages over the incumbent.
1. More qualified and experienced to hold the office. (He watched reruns of his father playing the president in West Wing).
2. More military experience, (he stared in Platoon and Navy Seals).
3. More knowledgeable about the economy, (he starred in Wall Street).
4. Is not a communist or socialist, (he was in Red Dawn).
5. More likely to defend our boarders, (again Red Dawn)
6. Is pro second amendment, (Starred in Young Guns).
7. Is pro law enforcement, (Costarred in the Rookie)
8. Could host far more memorable state dinner parties, (see arrest record).
9. Could actually get a ball across home plate at the start of the baseball season. (stared in Eight Men Out and Major League).
10. Knows the middle east better, (see Hot Shots part Deux)
11. More decisive and has a high energy level.
12. Comparatively more sane.
13. Much more honest.
14. Much more intelligent.
15. Much less arrogant.
16. Has two first ladies, who are much better looking and more experienced in front of the camera.
17. Is all about WIN.
18. While a little sketchy, looks much more Presidential.
19. While a little sketchy, spends money far more sensibly.
20. Unfortunately, both Charlie and the incumbent have a history of drug use. But Charlie just passed a drug test.
21. Surrounds himself with a much better class of people.
22. Is honest about his religious beliefs.
23. Lets it all hang out and is open with people; no hidden agenda.
24. Is more consistent.
25. Looks much more “together” and less haggard than the incumbent.
26. While less experienced with a teleprompter, he is still pretty good.
27. Better ratings.
28. Enjoys a better relationship with Israel and the Jewish community.
29. Was raised in America and was not influenced by third world socialists in his formative years, (just the ones in Hollywood).
30. Has Tiger blood.
31. Admits he is from Mars. The incumbent refuses to say.
32. Does not play Golf……constantly.
33. Not as uptight and a little less inhibited.