i'm a little drunk right now, so don't mind the spelling, but here it is! noah 9000's guide on who you are going to meet playing gears of war.
1) the noob
this person will have little to no kills. he will not talk. he will dance around and wait for other people to die, and then he will rush in, getting owned.
2) the senior
this person will wall bounce like a mutha' fucka' slaying people left and right in the first round. after the 5th or 6th round he will start to complain, stating "no WAY!" or "FUCK you host!"
3) the host
this can go either way. usually, it's someone who needs that advantage. they stay in the middle until 6 or 7 people are in the room. and then BAM! "are you host??" me? noooo of course not!"
another scenario: the host is honest and a good player... pshhh
4) the host's apprentice
this guy hears "i'm hosting this map again! same shit!" and goes ga ga for it. he desperately searches room after room, thinking "wow, that was a good connection. i have to FIND this guy!"
more often than not, this guy does horrible if his gay lover is not on his team.
5) the guy with seriously
the guy with seriously is usually silent. and he usually does BAD.
he's generally SO hyped about having his cheevo that he plays another match just so people can see what he's done. he doesn't speak of it, but he sure as fuck hints at it.
6) the guy with seriously (part 2)
this guy thinks he's a badass. he's loud, insulting, and he changes his GT to something with all caps and crashes raven down matches. even though people still need the cheevo, this guy is like a retired QB whom needs attention. badly. and if he kills ANYONE, he talks shit about them.
"you're trash"
"you're garbage"
"wow. sell your game"
(not to mention host this and host that)
7) the dweeb
the dweeb might also be mistaken for the nerd.
or possibly the stoner, if you can fathom that.
the dweeb constantly says "it's just a game, guys! calm down!"
while these people make the most sense, they are generally made fun of the most. these guys are probably more successful than other GOW players, but GOW is like high school ALL over again.
i had more, but i think i was sober when i thought of it...
as it stands, i'm the dweeb.
if anyone can think of more, i'd love to read it.
1) the noob
this person will have little to no kills. he will not talk. he will dance around and wait for other people to die, and then he will rush in, getting owned.
2) the senior
this person will wall bounce like a mutha' fucka' slaying people left and right in the first round. after the 5th or 6th round he will start to complain, stating "no WAY!" or "FUCK you host!"
3) the host
this can go either way. usually, it's someone who needs that advantage. they stay in the middle until 6 or 7 people are in the room. and then BAM! "are you host??" me? noooo of course not!"
another scenario: the host is honest and a good player... pshhh
4) the host's apprentice
this guy hears "i'm hosting this map again! same shit!" and goes ga ga for it. he desperately searches room after room, thinking "wow, that was a good connection. i have to FIND this guy!"
more often than not, this guy does horrible if his gay lover is not on his team.
5) the guy with seriously
the guy with seriously is usually silent. and he usually does BAD.
he's generally SO hyped about having his cheevo that he plays another match just so people can see what he's done. he doesn't speak of it, but he sure as fuck hints at it.
6) the guy with seriously (part 2)
this guy thinks he's a badass. he's loud, insulting, and he changes his GT to something with all caps and crashes raven down matches. even though people still need the cheevo, this guy is like a retired QB whom needs attention. badly. and if he kills ANYONE, he talks shit about them.
"you're trash"
"you're garbage"
"wow. sell your game"
(not to mention host this and host that)
7) the dweeb
the dweeb might also be mistaken for the nerd.
or possibly the stoner, if you can fathom that.
the dweeb constantly says "it's just a game, guys! calm down!"
while these people make the most sense, they are generally made fun of the most. these guys are probably more successful than other GOW players, but GOW is like high school ALL over again.
i had more, but i think i was sober when i thought of it...
as it stands, i'm the dweeb.
if anyone can think of more, i'd love to read it.
