Oh for the love of.... what game does Super Hyper X have to review this time? Oh... wait a minute... Gears of War? Wow, finally I'm reviewing a game a lot of people play. Isn't that great?
The game starts of with some guy named Marcus Fenix, who's in prison, and a guy named Dom busts him out, so he can help him fight off the locust. Now if you actually read the gaming booklet (which I doubt), the manual clearly states, and I quote:
"With most urban centers and military installations rubble, the human survivors gathered on Jacinto Plateau, whose solid granite strata could not be easily penetrated. When the Horde breached the plateau's defenses, Marcus Fenix defied orders to save his father at East Barricade Academy... but he was too late. Marcus was subsequently charged with dereliction of duty and sentenced to 40 years in Jacinto Maximum Security Penitentiary."
THERE, I SAID IT! If you read the booklet, you'd know why Marcus Fenix was in Prison. Seriously, there's even a long boring story in the Crimson Skies manual.
Moving on..... lets look at the graphics.
Other than the bright gorgeously apocalyptic environments, Gears of War is known for its blood and gore. Dead bodies can be beheaded or torn to pieces. The blood is ludicrous and all over the damn place. Also the animation is good, I personally think it's neat how you can pushed dead bodies with your feet. I also like how everyone doesn't look the same. Hooray for variety!
Next, is the sound. All I can say for the voice work is that it is very cave man. Everybody has got a gruff voice. Looks like the tough guy voice is in season for the the year 20XX. And next, we've got the music. OK, this is orchestral music, and I know I hate orchestral music but this music is THRILLING! Seriously, the best I ever heard... but I still like Braid's better.
OK, I have to admit I found a slight hitch in the game play here. I noticed that the bullets move slow for the machine gun, so you have to shoot slightly ahead of your enemies when they are moving in order to hit them. No big deal, it takes skill. This game takes more skill than Modern Warfare 2 to master. Seriously, if you master it, you're a gaming god. Every weapon you need is in this game, especially the Torque Bow.
But one thing that frustrates me is the playability. The A button is for rolling, running and cover. I really think its messed up when it doesn't work the way you want it to, when I want to hide behind cover but instead I roll. Also rolling is very directional, and it takes forever to maneuver properly after doing it. After you roll, your a sitting duck. On the plus side, I like the active reloads and how every weapon has some sort of melee function.
But you have to be crazy to not realize how much fun this game is. Gears of War has the best co-op experience ever. Seriously, I though Gears 2's co-op sucked. But besides co-op, you get to blow your enemies to bits with shotgun blasts, grenades, and torque bows. But the shotgun.... why does everyone have a shotgun? It shouldn't be with everyone, it should be in the map! Nobody picks up the other weapons, because they have a shotgun! It should be in the middle of the map, not in everyones hands! Oh wait, that's right, you can change it. But why is it the default option? Really, why?
OK, we are done. Overall score, 9.5. As for the achievements, they take forever. You have to get some online, and you have to beat the game as Dom too.
Anyways, I'm done reviewing. I don't care if you buy the game or not, because it's your choice to prepare for a Locust apocalypse or not. If you come to my door asking for help, I'll shoot you and use you as a bait for the Locust to rape while I run away. You should have bought it when you had the chance.
(F. Y. I. These articles need a "check grammar" option. Took me forever to spell apocta... aptco... apapcalipse.... whatever.)
The game starts of with some guy named Marcus Fenix, who's in prison, and a guy named Dom busts him out, so he can help him fight off the locust. Now if you actually read the gaming booklet (which I doubt), the manual clearly states, and I quote:
"With most urban centers and military installations rubble, the human survivors gathered on Jacinto Plateau, whose solid granite strata could not be easily penetrated. When the Horde breached the plateau's defenses, Marcus Fenix defied orders to save his father at East Barricade Academy... but he was too late. Marcus was subsequently charged with dereliction of duty and sentenced to 40 years in Jacinto Maximum Security Penitentiary."
THERE, I SAID IT! If you read the booklet, you'd know why Marcus Fenix was in Prison. Seriously, there's even a long boring story in the Crimson Skies manual.
Moving on..... lets look at the graphics.
Other than the bright gorgeously apocalyptic environments, Gears of War is known for its blood and gore. Dead bodies can be beheaded or torn to pieces. The blood is ludicrous and all over the damn place. Also the animation is good, I personally think it's neat how you can pushed dead bodies with your feet. I also like how everyone doesn't look the same. Hooray for variety!
Next, is the sound. All I can say for the voice work is that it is very cave man. Everybody has got a gruff voice. Looks like the tough guy voice is in season for the the year 20XX. And next, we've got the music. OK, this is orchestral music, and I know I hate orchestral music but this music is THRILLING! Seriously, the best I ever heard... but I still like Braid's better.
OK, I have to admit I found a slight hitch in the game play here. I noticed that the bullets move slow for the machine gun, so you have to shoot slightly ahead of your enemies when they are moving in order to hit them. No big deal, it takes skill. This game takes more skill than Modern Warfare 2 to master. Seriously, if you master it, you're a gaming god. Every weapon you need is in this game, especially the Torque Bow.
But one thing that frustrates me is the playability. The A button is for rolling, running and cover. I really think its messed up when it doesn't work the way you want it to, when I want to hide behind cover but instead I roll. Also rolling is very directional, and it takes forever to maneuver properly after doing it. After you roll, your a sitting duck. On the plus side, I like the active reloads and how every weapon has some sort of melee function.
But you have to be crazy to not realize how much fun this game is. Gears of War has the best co-op experience ever. Seriously, I though Gears 2's co-op sucked. But besides co-op, you get to blow your enemies to bits with shotgun blasts, grenades, and torque bows. But the shotgun.... why does everyone have a shotgun? It shouldn't be with everyone, it should be in the map! Nobody picks up the other weapons, because they have a shotgun! It should be in the middle of the map, not in everyones hands! Oh wait, that's right, you can change it. But why is it the default option? Really, why?
OK, we are done. Overall score, 9.5. As for the achievements, they take forever. You have to get some online, and you have to beat the game as Dom too.
Anyways, I'm done reviewing. I don't care if you buy the game or not, because it's your choice to prepare for a Locust apocalypse or not. If you come to my door asking for help, I'll shoot you and use you as a bait for the Locust to rape while I run away. You should have bought it when you had the chance.
(F. Y. I. These articles need a "check grammar" option. Took me forever to spell apocta... aptco... apapcalipse.... whatever.)
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